mother of two young women

Single mother raised 2 daughters with no support from their father who was in and out of prison and our lives for the past 13 years. They had no other male role models growing up. They were both active in sports competetively which included travel for the 3 of us on many occasion. We were also active in scouts, I was their leader for 10 years. We were always very close and they were always very responsible. My oldest daughter became pregnant at 17 while senior in high school. She graduated and entered college without success after 2 years. She held a menial job for 2 years that she was recently terminated from and lives off and on with her grandmother, which irritates me on many levels, collects unemployement and food stamps, . She recently got several peircings and tatoos, which I have a few tatoos, so I can't say too much. She is also a young mother, however, the father of my grandchild is involved and brings her to visit me frequently. My other daughter graduated high school, entered college, recently dropped her classes after I spent $500 in books (she will probably blame me for this cause she totaled her car that I helped her buy and paid insurance for, and no longer has ride to school since we are not speaking and she is not borrowing my car). she is not interested in working fast food and has taken a job at a gentlemen's club and this just threw me over the edge and I have not spoken to either one since except when I got letter from my insurance company asking about coverage for 18 yr. old since she had visited family dr. I had to let her know that since she dropped her college classes and applied for food stamps and medicaid, she could no longer be my dependent on my insurance. Both live with friends or my mother, which again pisses me off, They grew up in decent home, which I still live in with their rooms only somewhat cleaned out(30 miles north of city - rural area, which I can understand they wanted away from). I have always helped them, probably too much, but I felt the need to compensate since their dad was in and out of their lives and never ever dependable, but we were always very close I thought and I was always there for them day and night for all activities, dinner, functions, performances, games, and just general routine stuff. And I know I give way too much advice, but I hold myself to the same standards, so what's a mom to do. Why did they go in the direction they went. Is it because I wanted them to go the other way, to college? The bad thing is I can ignore them and be fine without the drama, but I know this won't last forever, or will it? I am the type of person that will be done with a person if they are not heading in the same direction as me. However, I also have a 5 yr. old son who hardly knows his sisters as it is and when they are around him they seem to be jealous of him. It's like they don't remember me doing the same things for them that I do for him (only with a little more age and patience but with less tolerance that comes with being an older parent). Almost given up.