Maya's Child Abuse Story

Maya from the United States writes: My story is a little bit difficult to tell because it's something that nobody knows except for my friend Olena. When I was little about 5 & 7 years old one of my neighbors raped me. It happened when I tried to get my sister's volleyball back. My neighbor told me to come into his house and that he would give me the ball if I took my pants off and let him kiss me in my vagina, but since I was a little girl I had no idea about what was really going on. This occurred twice at least of what I can recall, but I’m not sure. Just a couple of weeks ago I realized what really happened to me. I guess as a child my mind didn’t know what was really going on and I decided to erase it, but now it came back. This didn’t only happen to me, it happened to my best friend as well, but thanks to God he didn’t rape her, he only kissed her in the lips. But I’m sure for her and even for me that this will always stay in our life. It will always haunt me for the rest of my life and sometimes I wake up and cry, and every time I try to tell someone, I just can't! I just need someone to help me, please! I need it and fast because my life is in danger. I have the thoughts of killing myself but I can’t, I guess I'm too scared to do it, but please if someone can help me!

Hello Maya,

First of all, let me say that I'm pleased that you decided to write and share your story. That's the first step in getting the help that you need in order to heal. Please do not consider suicide as an option, there are other ways to deal with the mental and emotional torment associated with abuse.

First of all, I want you to call the National Suicide Hotline to help you address your suicidal thoughts. If you need to talk to me further, I am an e-mail away. I check my e-mail all the time.

I am also recommending that you speak with a school or mental health counselor in your local area to ensure you get all the undivided care you can speak of. The counselor will help you work through the abuse and how to deal with the effects you're experiencing now (i.e., waking up and crying).

I'm glad you recognize that it wasn't your fault and that you were too young to know what was going on. I understand the need to erase the past or to "pretend like it didn't happen," but all too often, the effects of the abuse will reappear in some other form if you're afraid to deal with it (i.e.,The effects appear in your current relationships, in your behaviors and moods, and in your self-worth). That's why I urge everyone to talk about the abuse and find ways to heal.

Maya, please know that you are not alone and there are others out there that will help. Please call the suicide hotline, get yourself involved in healthy relationships (i.e., relationships that are respectful of you and your boundaries), investigate everything that makes you happy and fulfilled, get in touch with the higher power, learn ways to improve your self-esteem, and the most important,

With Love,

If you would like to comment on Maya's story, please post your comment below and I will post the comment on her page. Only encouraging, inspiring, and "been there-understanding" messages are accepted.

Search the Relationship-with-self directory for more child abuse stories...

	Enter your search terms Submit search form
	Web www.relationship-with-self.com