Masturbation
Questions and Answers
Masturbation Questions #1):
My girlfriend is
very shy and has turned her nose up at the idea of us masturbating
together, something that was very common in my prior relationships. She
won't even watch me do it-says it's disgusting. I've never heard that
from a woman before.
I'm starting to lose confidence because I never know what she'll like
or dislike. That has made me afraid to suggest new things, or just be
myself in the bedroom, and now I feel our sex life is somewhat bland. I
don't want the problem to perpetuate, but I'm not sure how to get her
to experiment a little. We're both in our 40's.
Best regards,
Bill
from the U.S.
A #1):
Hey Bill,
Does your
girlfriend know how you feel about your sex life? If not, I would
suggest that you talk to her about this just as you are here and see
how that goes. Does she just shy away from masturbating together? Or
does she seem to shy away from the whole idea of having sex? She may
have a way that she enjoys that she hasn't explained to you yet.
Even though you're
afraid, ask her what she wants. This will show her that you are
interested in pleasing her. If she doesn't have an answer try these
things, kiss her on the neck slowly, touch her softly, and take your
time. Try not to compare your current sex life with your past
relationships b/c you may end up disappointing yourself in the end. And
it never hurts to communicate about your sex life. Actually,
communicating with each other is more of a turn on than you may know
(at least from a woman's perspective ;)
If you thoroughly
enjoy the masturbating part, ask her if she would try masturbating
while having sex with the lights off and see how that goes. If she
continues to avoid masturbating together, let it go and always try
other things. Don't give up! There will be something that the two of
you can enjoy!
Sincerely,
Brandy Shirley, M.A.
Masturbation
Questions
#2):
John writes...
I like to
masturbate at work. My co-workers are offended & HR wants to
talk to me about it. Should I tell them to fck off?
A
#2):
Hi John,
No you should not
tell them to f** off, unless you want to be fired. Masturbation is
healthy and encouraged. However, there comes a time when you need to
set boundaries for yourself, especially at the workplace. Since your
masturbation habits have caused distress with your co-workers, it's
necessary for HR to take a look into this. And if this has been an
ongoing thing such as continually exposing yourself to co-workers,
there may be a much bigger issue here. It may be best, in the future,
to keep your masturbating habits at home where it doesn't offend
anyone. However, if you cannot stop this behavior, talk to a local
therapist or doctor about your concerns.
Sincerely,
Brandy Shirley, M.A.
Masturbation Questions #
3.)
BN writes…
I am 52 years old.
I started masturbating when I was eleven years old. I enjoy keeping my
penis near the no return point or just before that, sometimes for hours
before ejaculating. Is masturbating once or twice a day at this age
harmful health wise?
A#3.)
Dear BN,
In my opinion, I do
not think it’s harmful to masturbate once or twice a day at
the age of 52, unless this is interfering with your relationships,
personal or business life. If you have not had any health concerns from
“keeping your penis near the no return point” then
I believe that you are okay. If you’re really concerned about
this habit, I recommend that you speak to your primary doctor about the
health risks. In all, if it’s not affecting your daily life
in any way, enjoy the pleasurable activity.
Brandy Shirley, M.A.
If you have your
own masturbation questions please feel free to write to me. I will
respond as soon as possible. If you do not want your question posted,
please let me know when you submit your question. Otherwise, I will
intend to share your masturbation questions with other
Relationship-with-Self viewers.
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