Marriage Counseling

Are you or your spouse contemplating marriage counseling?

If this is the case, I will help you decide whether or not the two of you need counseling.

When your relationship has hit some "rocky" moments, take a breath and get yourself back together.

Just because your relationship is struggling, doesn't mean it's over with!

Have hope that you and your spouse can get through this. Do everything you possibly can to make it work.

However, if you have done everything and are at your last rope, read further!

How to know when you need marriage counseling

Here are some common reasons for needing marriage counseling:

1. Lack of healthy communication skills.

   This is the most important tool needed in a relationship. Everything below can be worked on if both partners are willing to openly communicate with each other.

2. Lack of intimacy.

   Sex is important in a marriage. If one partner is denying the other partner of sex, he or she will feel unwanted, which may cause some resentment and anger.

3. Different values, beliefs, and interests.

   Unfortunately, many people rush into marriage without really knowing their partner. If your partner has different values and beliefs than you, there will typically be a lot of arguing.

4. One or both partners have low self-esteem.

   Having low self-esteem does affect the other partner's sense of self. If you feel like you have low self-esteem, I recommend that you check out the article, how to build your self-confidence.

This article will walk you through all the steps in building your self-worth.
5. Disagreements with parenting.

   The main issue with this is, one or both partners feel devalued when their spouse lacks respect for their parenting abilities.

Cheating is also a common reason for marriage counseling, but cheating is usually a symptom of something else (such as low self-esteem, lack of communication, or lack of intimacy.)

Marriage Counseling Advice

The best piece of advice I can give you is, work on your communication skills, be honest with each other, respect each other, and love each other unconditionally.

This is difficult, however, if you are unable to respect yourself and love who you are unconditionally.

If you are abusive and neglectful to yourself, you'll be the same to your significant other.

There's been one single passage in one of my favorite books that has helped me in my marriage. This passage has helped me stay true to myself and respect my husband at the same time.

Passage about Loving the Self when in a Relationship! "Let each person in relationship worry about Self-what Self is being, doing, having; what Self is wanting, asking, giving; what Self is seeking, creating, experiencing, and all relationships would magnificently serve their purpose-and their participants! Let each person in relationship worry not about the other, but only, only, only, about Self. This seems a strange teaching, for you have been told that in the highest form of relationship, one worries only about the other. Yet I tell you this: your focus upon the other-your obsession with the other-is what causes relationships to fail. What is the other being? What is the other doing? What is the other having? What is the other saying? Wanting? Demanding? What is the other thinking? Expecting? Planning? The truth is, it doesn't matter what the other is being, doing, having, saying, wanting, demanding. It doesn't matter what the other is thinking, expecting, planning. It only matters what you are being in relationship to that. The most loving person is the person who is Self-Centered. Written by Neale Donald Walsch from the Book: Conversations with God, Book 1 (pg. 124).

This passage is basically saying that many times in marriages or in other romantic relationships we lose sight of ourselves.

However, the most important thing to remember is; know yourself in a relationship, speak your truth, and you will learn how to appreciate your partner.

Marriage counseling is a tool to help couples get back in touch with each other. I highly recommend couples to take advantage of this tool, which is provided in almost every residential area.

If you're not willing to participate in counseling, that's okay. If your partner is not willing, that's okay too.

But do make an effort to make changes in your life, starting with yourself first. Your relationship with your spouse will then start to improve.

How to love others unconditionally.

How to overcome jealousy.

Are you having communication problems in your relationships?

Return from Marriage Counseling to Unhappy Marriage



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