| Kenneth from the United States writes: I want many of you to know that you are not alone. As Brandy said there are different types of abuse, and one that is not often talked about as much as the physical is the mental abuse. We are told so often growing up that we can't do it. We learn to doubt ourselves. Our parents steer us away from striving for anything hard as they tell us we won't succeed. My father once talked me out of going into communications. I wanted to be a radio dj, he told me to forget it because I would never get a job in it. Too competitive he said. I also write poetry and never got encouragement. I was told not to take it too seriously because there was nothing I could do with it. I learned to expect failure, I learned not to set high goals, because it was safer not to. It has hurt me much in my life. I have passed many opportunities because I have felt I am "just not good enough, and will get rejected. It's tough to grow up like that. But what I must do is to have confidence in myself. And too, understand that if I really want to accomplish something, no matter how difficult, that it is up to me whether I can accomplish the goal, not up to someone else who thinks I can't. Most of us really feel we need our parents' approval, but the reality is we don't. It could be a nice bonus, but it is not necessary. We must please ourselves foremost. That is most important. I have slowly accomplished many things in my life, including becoming a pretty darn good English teacher, and also have accomplished several goals in writing, publications, 10 books of poetry, two pushcart nominations, became a tennis teacher and all this despite the "discouragement" and I really feel every one can. Believe in yourself, you can!!!!!!!!!!! peace | 
