Don't Ever Call Me Mom!!

I am 36 yrs old. I have been through so much with my mom, who has recently told me never to call her mom again..

My mom divorced my abusive father when i was a toddler, she has since dated a lot and I went through all of those relationships, being forced to be around her boyfriends, moving in and out with them. One tried to molest me and she didn't believe me. The second time he tried i called my grandmother and she sent my uncles to the apartment where I was forced to stay, i was probably in 6 or 7th grade. In front of my uncle(s) she questioned him and he just smiled.
That was the end of that relationship, but there were lots more.

My grandparents did step in and there were disagreements with my mom and her mom about me. I began living with my grandparents, best thing in the world for me!!

So, my mom re-married in 1994 and had another daughter, I was so happy, and proud. My step-father has always treated me like a daughter. But, they have been separated for the last 4 years.

I recently gave birth to my second child, a daughter and my mom came to help, she was no help. She has a new boyfriend, and was on the phone with him all day and all night. I had a c-section, and she didn't want to drive my husband's car because it's an expensive car (it's not)..

So, i had to drive my 7 year old son to camp. My husband spoke to my mom and she said a woman has to do what a woman has to do, and I need to be a woman. Well, the boyfriend has been in the picture for a month and she was telling him i love you and calling him baby in front of me and my sister, which was uncomfortable for my sister because she is still married to her dad.

When my mom has a boyfriend, she changes and not in a good way. I see this cycle again. I took my sister to the salon, and when we got back my mom told us this boyfriend was coming to pick them up. we live in different states. I couldn't believe this is how i was going to meet this man. I asked my mom how am I suppose to explain this to my son. She said he'll be fine. my son is very smart, he asked me why is grandma breaking the law, by being married and having a boyfriend?

So, my mom and i had a big argument and had not spoken until yesterday, when she told me i had no respect for her or her relationships and that she is not my mom and to never call her mom again!! When i graduated from high school, she put me out because i hugged my dad before her, but he was outside waiting and he was the first person i saw. That's just a little of what i dealt with.

My daughter was born in may, 2010, we visited my grandmother this month for her birthday and mom did not speak to me or look at me. I pray every night that my relationship with my daughter is a great one!! But, I am hurting really bad. My husband said, i have been with you for years and since i have known you, your mother has been hurting you. my grandmother is upset and says she loves me and will always be my mom. she told me to take of my beautiful family and move on!!