Relationship-with-Self Newsletter: Issue 002

Hello All,

Creating a loving relationship with yourself is an ongoing process of failures, setbacks, success, happiness, sadness, and so much more. However, I am here to help you through your journey of life by providing the necessary tips for living a life full of love, acceptance, and understanding rather than a life full of fear, negativity, and disappointments. I hope you enjoy today's newsletter and please drop me a line with your comments, suggestions, or appreciation. I would love to hear from you!

All the best,

Brandy Shirley, M.A.

In this issue..

Humor:A funny story about a man with a taser.
Inspiration: Great inspirational quotes to motivate you to love yourself unconditionally.
A Loving Tip: Get reacquainted with yourself.
Questions/Answers: Do you have a question or concern about your life or about this site? Share your questions with others.
Freebies: Angels for Hope is a website that offers great inspirational items of hope and love. Send these pieces, for FREE, to your loved ones who are in a time of need.
Recommended Resources: I highly recommend watching the movie, Sicko!
New Relationship-with-Self Information: Check out all the new articles added this month.
Upcoming Information: Relationship-with-Self e-books and new articles.

Humor

Subject: "Only a guy would do this!"

"A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this...."

"Last weekend at Larry's Pistol and Pawn Shop I was looking for something extra for my wife Toni. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on the assailant. The idea is to allow my wife--who would never consider a gun--adequate time to retreat to safety. WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded in two triple-a batteries and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. But then I read (yes, 'read') that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get a blue arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs and I'd know it was working.

Awesome!!!(Actually, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.) Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries, right?!!

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh and blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat.

But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.

So, I'm sitting alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, "don't do it," reasoning that a one-second burst from such a tiny ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.

I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION@!@$$!%!@*!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, and body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs.

You should know, if you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, that there is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.

SON-OF-A..that hurt like hell!!! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected what little wits I had left, sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they get up there???

My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been sot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles!!! I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return.

Still in shock,

Earl"

Inspiration

Saint Theresa's Prayer

"May today there be peace within. May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be confident knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us."

A Loving Tip--Getting Reacquainted with Myself

However, this session's tip is about the importance of getting reacquainted with yourself, now! I'm not sure if you remember, but about three weeks ago I posted some information on the blog about my "future experiment" of getting reacquainted with myself. If you don't remember here is a copy of that posting....

"I wanted to inform everyone that I am going to do a little experiment on myself.. I am going to take my own advice and get to know myself a little better. Here's the experiment...
1. Get to know God better.


2. Exercise every other day.


3. Let go of some unhealthy food choices..sigh....


4. Give myself time to do nothing..gasp..This one is going to be very hard for me.


5. Set some well-needed boundaries for myself.


6. Journal this experience.



Everything that I am doing here, I will post during the next newsletter. The most difficult part of this experience will be doing nothing and getting to know God better. I cannot stand to be bored, but I need to do this because it's something I need to face (a weakness of mine.)

So I thought I would share this experience as a learning tool for others who have difficulty taking time out for themselves as well. I will share with you how I went about these goals and the difficulties I faced.

Here's to loving myself...

If you would like to do your own experiment, please post your story during the next newsletter. There will be an opportunity to share this with others. Sharing your story will be a great motivator for actually taking time out for yourself.

Take care.."

So, I have taken my own advice and have gotten to know myself a little better. And here is what I have found out...

Getting Closer to God..

• I have to say that I have been searching hard for God. I don't know about you, but sometimes I do not feel like God is anywhere to be found. I long for a closeness with this being and often struggle in finding her, him, or whatever it is.

  So, this is what I have done to find some sort of closeness..

  I turned inward and put some time aside in my day or week to do this. On one particular day at work, I needed to revitalize myself before seeing any of my clients.

  I had a few hours to myself, so I turned off the overhead light in my office and sat in my rocking chair to get myself comfortable. I closed my eyes and proceeded to practice self-hypnosis. (If you would like to learn more about self-hypnosis check out the

  Free Online Hypnosis Course for a great stress relieving tool.) While I was practicing self-hypnosis, I started to feel at peace with myself. So, I decided to try to get in touch with God through this experience.

  I started to ask questions like.."Are you here with me!" and "How am I doing in life." I remained very still and just let whatever come over me to take over. It was kind of like I was having a conversation with myself. I responded to my own questions with very calming, inspiring, and positive comments. And I started to feel at more peace and very happy with myself.

  So, overall, that was my experience with God that day. I still don't know what or who this being is, but I know that when I take some time to get in touch with God, something or someone is there to always help me. I have noticed that when I am going about my busy day I'll find myself asking, "Where are you God!" and I won't get a response. However, when I'm not doing anything, for instance, I can feel something or someone there with me more often than not.

Exercising every other day..

• Okay, I have to admit, I didn't do this! But I did exercise about 1-2 times a week. I mainly practiced Yoga called, "Goddess Booty!" Funny huh!! "Your fine muscular behind!" Yeah, I'm trying to work my booty! :) I follow a yoga DVD and feel that this is the best way for me to stay fit, have structure, and have a schedule to my workout.

  What I still have to work on is adding variety to my workout and doing it a lot more. I find it a lot more difficult to follow a routine when it's cold outside, but this is something I will have to get over sooner or later!

Letting go of some unhealthy food choices..

• I use to typically eat pretty healthy. However, since my husband and I have gotten married, I have let some of my healthy habits go. Although my husband and I both like to eat healthy, we have both gotten lazy. It's much easier to make pizza or order take out after a hard day of work than it is to make a full course healthy meal.

  However, I am tired of my love handles and I am tired of feeling uncomfortable in my clothes. So, it has to stop!

  Today, I went to the grocery store and bought a lot a vegetables, fruits, healthy meats, and fish. I walked past the ice cream and chocolate cake this time around, just to give myself a little break from overloading on junk. But, I will always allow myself to have some sweats! It's a love of mine and I have to honor that! :)

Giving myself time to do nothing..

• Ummm... Well, I have tried! Every morning for the past three weeks, after I eat breakfast, I give myself time to stare out the window. We have a huge front window and I always find myself staring off to outer space and before I know it, it's time to get ready for work.

  The hardest part is getting up early enough to allow myself time to space out! Other than that, I find myself doing something throughout the rest of my day. So, if I don't take time in the morning, I will run through the day without realizing I need some "doing nothing time."

Setting boundaries for myself..

• The healthy boundaries I have set for myself are..
  • Give myself time to have fun and not work.

  I actually allowed myself to go out this past weekend with a girlfriend and without my husband ;) Although I love my husband dearly, sometimes I need some time just with the girls. So, he hung out with his friends and I went out with my girlfriends (or in this case one of my friends.)

  I couldn't believe what a difference this made in the way I felt about myself. It gave me a chance to let go of responsibility and have fun. I will do this more often! My goal is to go out with just the girls at least once a month.

  • Evaluate my relationships. Determine which relationships are meaningful and which relationships I need to let go of.

    What I struggle with the most in my relationships is knowing how much I can give of myself. I question how much time and effort I want to invest in my personal relationships because I only have so much time and energy. So, I am very careful about who I hang out with. I will not allow myself to be around a lot of negativity, people who put me down, or any drama whatsoever!

    I pay special attention to the people who respect my values, beliefs, time, and uniqueness. Not to sound arrogant, but anything less than that I don't have time for! The people that I do give my attention too, however, I treat them with respect, honor, and appreciation.

  Journal my experience:

• I didn't do this. But I did keep track of the times when I exercised. The reason I didn't journal is because I knew that it would all come to me when I started writing the next newsletter. In a way the newsletter is my "world" journal ;)

If you would like to share your own "Getting Reacquainted with Myself" experience please contact me and I will be glad to share it during our next newsletter!

Questions/Answers

Please read the privacy policy for any reassurance you may need for confidentiality.

Freebies

All you have to do is complete a request and send it. They will take care of the rest. The one thing to remember, however, is to only send requests to those who are in "extreme" need of some hope, inspiration, and love.

I recently sent a request in hopes of perking up my boss. He lost his son this past year due to an awful car accident. So, I thought I would send him an angel to let him know that his son is still with him in spirit. He hasn't received it yet, so I'm not sure how the items look in person. But, I am awaiting excitedly. He won't know that I sent the item because I chose the option to send the product anonymously.

Recommended Resources

Recommended Resources:

I highly recommend watching the movie"Sicko" with Michael Moore. This movie is about the United State's poor health system. Michael compares the United State's health system with other countries. He interviews "real" people about their experience with health insurance.

Since I have several clients who have trouble getting affordable health care because of financial and "preexisting" conditions, I found this movie to be very relative for my client's experience as well as true for the general American population.

If there is not a link to click on for the movie and you would like to purchase this movie or discover more about it, copy and paste the above url into your web browser.

New Relationship-with-Self Information

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

Mimi's Child Abuse Story

A chance to share a child abuse story and receive "free" professional advice.

The Relationship-with-Self Site Map: Can't seem to find an article that you were looking at while viewing Relationship-with-Self? The Site Map will help you find the article you were looking for.

Fun Personality Survey: This survey is a great opportunity to share more about who you are with others. This also provides an opportunity for others to respond to your survey if they desire. When I completed my own survey, it really got me thinking about who I really am. I highly recommend that you take the time to do this.

Personality Disorders

A Career Assessment Opportunity: If you are in the process of trying to find the right job for you, I highly recommend completing the Free MAPP Assessment sample. If you decide that you like what the MAPP sample has to offer, the full assessment will allow you the opportunity to find the right career for you.

If you would like to keep an "instant" update on the new material added, sign up for the relationship-with-self blog to stay informed.

Upcoming Features

Here is a look into the future of relationship-with-self.....

• Two new e-books; one on communication and the other on your childhood.
• Information on how to "Improve your Patience."
• An article on the "Importance of Attitude."
• How to add humor into your daily living. (How to laugh at yourself.)
• How to control your gossiping and why this is important.
• How to deal with guilt.
• How to take something bad that has happened to you and turn it into something good!
• How to control suicidal thoughts and the importance of this.
• How to control your "complaining" and discover what this does to your psyche.
• Tips for living on a frugal income and how to make the best of this experience.
• How to accept your flaws for what they are.
• Tips for letting go of the "control freak" in you.
• Learn about the beauty of gratitude.
• An article about how your thoughts can impact your mental, physical, and emotional well-being.

Stay tuned for so much more....

Until next time.. Go out and be Yourself! And of course, Make loving yourself a priority!

www.Relationship-with-Self.com